Category Archives: Kids Say the Darndest Things

Silly Questions

When did your finger start hurting? (To a 10 year old complaining of finger pain.)
“When I punched the wall.”  

When did you start feeling sick? (To a 9 year old with a sore throat and cough.)
“After my sister coughed in my face.”

When did your head start hurting? 
“When my teacher started talking about similes and metaphors”. (Ahh, 4th grade.)

And from a (very precocious) 4-year-old patient of mine: 
When did your throat start hurting? 
“I don’t know.” 
Well, was it yesterday maybe? 
“Don’t be ridiculous. It was *way* before yesterday.”

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Just a Bear

Me to my 2 1/2-year-old patient: “See you later alligator.”

Response: “I’m not an alligator!”

Me: “What are you then?”

“I’m just a bear, Dr. Kim.”

 

Glad to have cleared that up….

 

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It’s All Fun And Games Until Someone Pokes An Ear Out

I have been getting great pleasure from parents telling me about how their children evoke my name at home (ah, the ego).
 
A 3-year-old patient of mine recently got a *very* small splinter and said to her mother:  “If this doesn’t get better soon I’ll have to go and see Dr. Kim.”  I think she is displaying excellent judgment in her self care, quite precocious in fact.
 
Sometimes, however, it seems that my name is a source of less positive behaviors.  A mother told me that her 2 1/2-year-old son was playing with another child’s doctor kit at a party.  As he placed the toy stethoscope on his playmate’s chest, my patient said “I’m Dr Kim, and I’m going to listen to your heart.”  It turns out that I am the pediatrician for both of these children and thus ensued, the mother related, quite a struggle between these two doctor proteges about who was going to be my namesake in their games.  Not exactly the way that I used to imagine boys fighting over me, but beggars can’t be choosers.
 
Today, however, a story from a mom gave me pause when thinking about the power that my words may have on the actions of my patients.  While playing, her 4 year old attempted to stick a carrot into his ear.  “Don’t do that!” she scolded.  “But Dr. Kim does,” he replied, quite pleased with himself.
 
In my attempts at distraction, I do frequently search for carrots in the ears of small children.  A word to the wise:  I think I’ll switch to butterflies.
 

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Crash Helmet

Me to my 9 year old patient:  What can you do to protect your head while riding a bicycle? 

My patient:  If you hit a branch you should hang onto the branch instead of falling down. 

Nice work, Evil Kneivel.  But I was trying to get you to wear a helmet.

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Not Rocket Science

After his mom told me that he had coughed for a month, my 4-year-old patient said to me today, with great glee, “And I have snot rockets!” 

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Rejoicing in Wrinkles: How to Pick a Pediatrician

As a relatively young female physician, I need to balance professionalism and personality.  I try to be a young, hip, vibrant pediatrician that connects with parents and kids, while at the same time projecting an air of competence, authority, and even wisdom so that families trust me.

I have a relatively informal manner, and I laugh a lot.  But when I need to be serious, I am.  

I wear a white coat, and I wear red boots.

I am still mistaken for a nurse and often get comments about how young I am to be a doctor.  But I also care for patients whose parents are degree-decorated professionals ten to fifteen years older than I am, and they need my advice and listen to what I say. Continue reading

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